1,193 quotes found
“She narrowed her eyes and concentrated on his mouth. Name. He wanted her name. She had to think about it for a second before she remembered. Great. She must have hit her head. Which, duh, explained...”
“There is no need to masturbate your brain, just to ejaculate your thoughts all over the place”
“She is an incredibly intelligent idiot”
“My best days are Monday through Friday, and Saturday and Sunday." "Ian," Wesley noted, "that covers the whole week." Ian nods his head. "Pretty much.”
“Here you go, dear."" The corners of Mrs. Colbert's mouth curled up. "You like meat, don't you?"Emily blinked. Was it her, or did that statement seem...loaded? She checked Issac for his reaction, bu...”
“Note to self-give serious thought to becoming an alcoholic.”
“Men exist because a vibrator can't fix a flat tire. On second thought, I should just buy a AAA card...”
“(Malory, unhopeful: "I don't suppose you have any tea?" Jesse: "DO YOU WANT EARL GREY OR DARJEELING?" Malory: "Oh, sweet heavens!")”
“Even if you haven't had the exclusivity conversation, they're still going to be mad if they find out you're dating someone they know and you haven't mentioned it. It's a dating rule." "Well, how am...”
“Shall I add a man to my collection?”
“Well, wasn't this a night for firsts. Sex. Arson. Pants.”
“So I'm all, "Owned! Bee-yatch! Dog fucking owned you!" Doing a minor booty dance of ownage, perhaps, in retrospect, a bit prematurely. (I believe hip-hop to be the apprpriate language for taunting,...”
“Your ma's dating?" Tim looks shocked. "I thought she pretty much confined herself to a vibrator and the shower nozzle since your dad screwed her over.”
“If I had wanted children of my own, I would have gotten married. If I had wanted to get married, I would have fallen in love. If I had wanted to fall in love, I would have met the right girl. If I ...”
“As far as the Council is concerned, the U.S. Wardens are a bunch of mushrooms.""Eh?""Kept in the dark and fed on bullshit.”
“It wasnt until someone kicked his legs that Nik woke up. Alek, snoring beside him, his head resting on his shoulder. Ban snoring on the other couch, the noise rivaled only by the dog. He looked int...”
“Just because youre allowed to use magic now you dont have to whip your wands out for every tiny little thing!”
“I jerk around and see Sister Dora, a portly woman who's the head cook in the kitchen, staring daggers at me. This is nothing new. She stares daggers at everyone who walks through the lunch line hol...”
“I need some kind of... like... last minute, poorly-set-up deus ex machina!!”
“Being here? With you? I've met my subconscious, and he's not that sick.”
