140 quotes found
Writer · American
American writer
“Don't bruise the Foo!”
“People, generally, suck.”
“I've won Satan's lottery.”
“I'm poor and my cat is huge.”
“The medium obscured the message.”
“Does the work get easier once you know what you are doing?""Your lungs grow thick with stone dust and your eyes bleary from the sun and fragments thrown up by the chisel. You pour your lifeblood ou...”
“Love: the sickest of Ironys sick jokes. The place where logic and order go to die.”
“Love needs room to grow. Like a rose. Or a tumor.”
“Boredom can be a lethal thing on a small island.”
“I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck.”
“If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.”
“Its sarcasm, Josh.Sarcasm?Its from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you arent really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.W...”
“There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.”
“She's so small, yet she contains so much evil.”
“I love you above all things, even pie.”
“I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.”
“Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. Theres no such place.”
“Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the m...”
“Joshua's ministry was three years of preaching, sometimes three times a day, and although there were some high and low points, I could never remember the sermons word for word, but here's the gist ...”
“Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry, you can't have a baby brother, because that would mean that Daddy had sex, and that's never going to happen again.”
“I've tried to get the angel to watch MTV so I can learn the vocabulary of your music, but even with the gift of tongues, I'm having trouble learning to speak hip-hop. Why is it that one can busta r...”
“He was a writer and words were his weapons.”
“Let me say right here, if I haven't made it clear, that I have seen as many pale, naked old-man parts in the last twenty-four hours to bruise my delicate psyche for a lifetime, so don't be surprise...”