140 quotes found
Writer · American
American writer
“The Painting is not shit,' said Lucien.'I know,' said Henri. 'That was just part of the subterfuge. I am of royal lineage; subterfuge is one of the many talents we carry in our blood, along with gu...”
“Of course they won't bloody remember, they'll be dead.' Then she called him a name in a dead language that translated, roughly, to 'poop on a stick,' but sounded more succinct, like this: 'Of cours...”
“I like a girl with a substantial bottom,' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.”
“Whistler,' Manet called. 'How's your mother?”
“Why write a song when no one can play the notes or understand the lyrics?”
“Andrew Lloyd Webber's version of the Kool-Aid jingle is at once chilling and evocative. Donny Osmond is brilliant as James Jones.”
“... but to remain historically accurate, I would have had to leave out an important question that I felt needed to be addressed, which is, 'What if Jesus had known kung fu?”
“And I was all, "Don't be gross, you crustacious fuck. You pull that thing out and I'll pepper-spray you until you fry." (You have to be stern with weenie waggers--I've been exposed to on the bus ov...”
“A womans magazine quiz:Question: You decide to do the dread deed and just as things are starting to get hot he comes, rolls over, and asks, Was it good for you?You:a. Say, God, yes! That was the be...”
“Lash had been explaining to her that it's impolite to refer to an African American as a nigga, unless one was another African American, when Troy Lee came in and said, "She only speaks Cantonese.""...”
“Abby Von Normal - And I'm like, "Don't change the subject, Kung Pao, what I want to know is if you're ready to spend some up-close and personal time with ninety pounds of barbarian woman-flesh! Sor...”
“Is she special? (asks the gay waiter)" I thinks she's going to break my heart" On arrival of the girl" The flannel is fine honey,but I have'nt seen anyone that over accesorized since batman!”
“No matter where he went in the City, there was an odoriferous mix of food and vehicles, like the alchemic concoctions of some mad gourmet mechanic: Kung Pao Saab Turbo, Buick Skylark Carbonara, Swe...”
“Science, you don't know, looks like magic.”
“All killer whales are named Kevin. You knew that, right?”
“Everyone thinks that it was the big strong caveman who got the girl, and for the most part, that may have been true, but physical strength doesn't explain how our species created civilization. I th...”
“We were seekers. You are that which is sought, Joshua. You are the source. The end is divinity, in the beginning is the word. You are the word.”
“There's a fine edge to new grief, it severs nerves, disconnects reality--there's mercy in a sharp blade. Only with time, as the edge wears, does the real ache begin.”
“The three jewels of Tao: compassion, moderation, and humility. Balthasar said compassion leads to courage, moderation leads to generosity, and humility leads to leadership.”
“Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong.”
