“Life sucks, and then you die.Yeah, I should be so lucky.”

“Life sucks, and then you die...”

“Hey, Rosalie? Do you know how to drown a blonde? Stick a mirror to the bottom of a pool.”

“You nicked-named my daughter after the Lock Ness Monster!”

“I know - I'll play you for it," Alice suggested. "Rock, paper, scissors."Jasper chuckled and Edward sighed."Why don't you just tell me who wins?" Edward said wryly.Alice beamed. "I do. Excellent.”

“No measure of time with you will be long enough, but we'll start with forever.”

“And so the lion fell in love with the lamb" he murmured. I looked away, hiding my eyes as I thrilled to the word."What a stupid lamb," I sighed."What a sick, masochistic lion.”

“Look after my heart - I've left it with you.”

“The bond forged between us was not one that could be broken by absence, distance, or time. And no matter how much more special or beautiful or brilliant or perfect than me he might be, he was as ir...”

“The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.”

“Why is it that all cars are women?" he asked. "Because they're fussy and demanding," answered Zee. "Because if they were men, they'd sit around and complain instead of getting the job done," I told...”

“Money may not buy happiness, but I'd rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.”

“You're stubborn- anyone ever tell you that before?”

“Wouldn't want to miss a war, would I?”

“In some ways blowjobs are better than sex because when you have a mouthful of cock you can't make snide comments.”