129 quotes found
Novelist · American
American novelist
“Bite me, Harry Potter.”
“I've never even been to Long Island”
“I love the Princess Diaries series! Do you?”
“You know your Lamborghini is on fire, right?”
“There will be no more British guys. Unless they are members of the royal family, of course. ”
“Being brave is when you have to do something because you know it is right, but at the same time, you are afraid to do it, because it might hurt or whatever. But you do it anyway.”
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear.”
“The fact is, I love him. He's the boy I want and one day he'll be MINE.”
“Wait. Why am I thinking about Krispy Kremes? Were supposed to be exercising.”
“Did you let him know that if he can't see fit to return your blow job immediately, you will have no choice but to sue?”
“And in what fairy tale would John ever be any sane person's idea of Prince Charming anyway? He was the opposite of charming. More like Prince Terrifying.”
“This was very exciting. I'd never had two boys get into a fight over me before. The fact that one of the boys was my stepbrother, however, and held about as much romantic appeal for me as Max, the ...”
“However, because they have no actual interests of their own (or if they do, they squelch them in order to fit in) and merely pursue those that they think will look best on their college apps, they'...”
“Michael has never cried during a Broadway show. Except in that scene where Tarzan's ape father is brutally murdered.And that was only because he was laughing so hard.”
“I loved you way before you ever had a chance to put a spell on me. I loved you at 'I've never been to Long Island,'" Zach said.I couldn't keep a big goofy grin from my face.I loved you at 'I like s...”
“And try to remember what we discussed, Susannah. A mediator is someone who helps others resolve conflicts. Not someone who, er, kicks them in the face.”
“Also, I think I felt something come loose back there. I'm not trying to overreact or anything but I think it was my uterus. Honest. I think my uterus jiggled free. My uterus is just going to come o...”
“No man wants to marry, Finnula. There are just some women they cant have any other way, and so it is a sacrifice willingly made in order to attain a particularly choice”
“Oh, that's just great. I come all the way back here, risking major brain cell burnout, and you don't even believe me? I'm basically guaranteeing myself a lifetime of heartbreak, and all you have to...”
“It's what's known as an origin myth. What happened to me? That's no myth.”
“Cal: Yesterday I was stuck in a car with you for eight hours. Bastard. I didnt even sing along with the radio. Much.Me: Yeah. And? Cal: Something happened.Me: If youre referring to my driving skill...”