“My dad used to say that life's a journey, but somebody screwed up and lost the map.”

“I am never taking a trip with either of you ever again.' Eve said. 'Ever.'Excellent' Shane said. 'Then next trip, we hit the strip bar.'I have a gun, Shane,' Eve sighed.What, you think i actually l...”

“Shane dragged Eve's suitcase into the room and dumped it on the floor beside her bed. Hey, Dark Princess? Heres your crap. Also, bite me.”

“Oh hell no. Guys dont talk about that crap.Youre serious.Really.What do you talk about?Shane looked at her as if she were insane. You know. Stuff. Were not girls. We dont talk about our feelings. I...”

“You couldn't be romantic if your life depended on it." "You know what's lucky? Most bad guys don't ask you to be romantic on command, so that probably won't matter.”

“I hate traveling with amateurs.”

“See?" she heard Shane yell at the kitchen. "She doesn't stomp around like a cattle stampede!""Bite me, Collins! No bacon for you, either!”

“If Myrnin pokes his crazy head up before then, call me and try to keep him, you know, stable.''Is he UNstable?''I don't know, how can I tell? You're the crazy whisperer!'She had a point. Claire cou...”

“Get in here and make me some dinnernow, woman.""News flash, Michael, you're supposed to be evil, not redneck!”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”

“I hate traveling with amateurs.”

“Yeah. She'd manipulated the second most powerful vampire in town into taking her side against a psycho bitch-queen sorority girl. She'd talked rationally about putting people's brains into computer...”

“I hate traveling with amateurs.”