Quotes by Lemony Snicket

“I think everyone's parents have secrets. You just have to know where to look for them.”

“Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding.”

“We both wanted to know each other's secrets, and we both wanted the other person to go first.”

“A secret note is secret. There is no reason to sign it.”

“The world is swirling with so many mysteries and secrets that nobody will ever track down all of them. But with a book you can stay up very late, reading until all the secrets are clear to you. The...”

“There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap, and it is better to stain the napkin than your clothing. The other is that it can serve as a per...”

“If only Uncle Monty knew what we know," Violet said, "and Stephano knew that he knew what we know. But Uncle Monty doesn't know what we know, and Stephano knows that he doesn't know what we know.""...”

“Simply put, dramatic irony is when a person makes a harmless remark, and someone else who hears it knows something that makes the remark have a different, and usually unpleasant, meaning. For insta...”

“Moxie gave me a small smile. "Why do you always say that- which here means?""I'll probably outgrow it," I said.”

“Being curious is the most important part of being a journalist. It might be the most important part of being anything.”

“If you ask one question, it will lead you to another, and another. It's like peeling an onion.”

“The book did not say anything about a statue, valuable or otherwise, and so I stopped reading about the Bombinating Beast and got interested in the chapter about the Stain'd witches, who had ink in...”

“Perhaps I should just bury myself and become a diamond after thousands of years of intense pressure”

“The real Santa Claus is at the mall.”

“Everybody will die, but very few people want to be reminded of that fact.”

“In an emergency, one often learns that one's companions can be of even less help in extraordinary circumstances than they are during an average evening.”

“People who think nothing can go wrong are usually disappointed.”

“When someone is crying, of course, the noble thing to do is to comfort them. But if someone is trying to hide their tears, it may also be noble to pretend you do not notice them.”

“...The sea... some have said is nothing but a library of all the tears in history.”

“Tears are curious things, for like earthquakes or puppet shows they can occur at any time, without any warning and without any good reason.”