“Boys. I'd turn gay if they weren't so sexy. ”

“Don't run I never liked fast food”

“Married and buried, wed and dead.”

“Now we're in the middle of a three-sided vampire war. Which would be an awesome video game, but I'm really not interested in playing for real. I like my reset buttons.”

“He dunked his tea bag and watched the results critically. I really must get a new supplier. This tea is pathetic. America just doesnt understand tea at all.”

“Want to play baseball? she asked. Shanes eyes opened, and he stopped stroking her hair. What? First base, she said. Youre already there. Im not running the bases. Well, you could at least steal sec...”

“Do be careful. I can't replace you as easily as all that.”

“There are always a few, Claire, who like being told what to do instead of being required to think. And those are the ones you should fear. That goes equally for humans, I'm afraid. Critical thinkin...”

“You've turned into quite a bossy little thing," Myrnin said. "I think I might like it.”

“Are you an idiot, or an idiot?' Gargarin hissed.'The first one. I really resent being called the second.”

“And Im stubborn, if you want absolute obedience, get a Labrador.”

“And it's really very difficult to kill someone when all your inner instincts would oblige you to take off your hat first!”

“See?" she heard Shane yell at the kitchen. "She doesn't stomp around like a cattle stampede!""Bite me, Collins! No bacon for you, either!”

“If Myrnin pokes his crazy head up before then, call me and try to keep him, you know, stable.''Is he UNstable?''I don't know, how can I tell? You're the crazy whisperer!'She had a point. Claire cou...”

“Get in here and make me some dinnernow, woman.""News flash, Michael, you're supposed to be evil, not redneck!”