“Dinner is not what you do in the evening before something else. Dinner is the evening.”

“The best things in life aren't things.”

“We seem to be going through a period of nostalgia, and everyone seems to think yesterday was better than today. I don't think it was, and I would advise you not to wait ten years before admitting t...”

“And Man created the plastic bag and the tin and aluminum can and the cellophane wrapper and the paper plate, and this was good because Man could then take his automobile and buy all his food in one...”

“Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.”

“This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security.”

“One thing I can guarantee you. You may not be a great deal wiser from my talk today but you will be a great deal older.”

“I want to thank everybody who made this day necessary.”

“I really don't deserve this but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.”