Quotes by Tom Lehrer

“If after hearing my songs just one human being is inspired to say something nasty to a friend or perhaps to strike a loved one it will all have been worth the while.”

“I dont think this kind of thing [satire] has an impact on the unconverted, frankly. Its not even preaching to the converted; its titillating the converted. I think the people who say we need satire...”

“Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.”

“My last public performance for money was in 1967. For free, it was 1972, with the exception of two little one-shot, one-song things. But that's just for friends, out of friendship for the people in...”

“Political satire became obsolete when they awarded Henry Kissinger the Nobel Peace Prize.”

“I am never forget the day I first meet the great Lobachevsky.In one word he told me secret of success in mathematics:Plagiarize!Plagiarize!Let no one else's work evade your eyes!Remember why the go...”

“It's a sobering thought: When Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.”

“I know that thete are people who do not love their fellow man and I hate people like that!”

“It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.”

“Laughter is involuntary. If it's funny you laugh.”

“I don’t think this kind of thing [satire] has an impact on the unconverted, frankly. It’s not even preaching to the converted; it’s titillating the converted. I think the people who say we need sat...”

“It's a sobering thought: When Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.”

“I know that thete are people who do not love their fellow man and I hate people like that!”

“It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.”

“Alas, irreverence has been subsumed by mere grossness, at least in the so-called mass media. What we have now — to quote myself at my most pretentious — is a nimiety of scurrility with a concomitan...”

“Andrew Wiles gently smiles, Does his thing, and voila! Q.E.D., we agree, And we all shout hurrah! As he confirms what Fermat Jotted down in that margin, Which could've used some enlargin'.”

“No one is more dangerous than someone who thinks he has The Truth. To be an atheist is almost as arrogant as to be a fundamentalist. But then again, I can get pretty arrogant.”

“I find enough mystery in mathematics to satisfy my spiritual needs. I think, for example, that pi is mysterious enough (don't get me started!) without having to worry about God. Or if pi isn't enou...”

“I would like to state at this time that I am not now and have never been... a member of the Boy Scouts of America. Their motto is, as you know, Be Prepared! and that is the name of this song.”

“Don't solicit for your sister, that's not nice, Unless you get a good percentage of her price.”