Quotes by Kathy Griffin

“I was raised right I talk about people behind their backs. It's called manners.”

“It always pisses me off when Im calling in to some Morning Zoo radio show to promote God-only-knows whatprobably this book, so get ready, Im cominwhen the DJ actually tries to convince me that ther...”

“A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. He didn't help me a bit. If it was up to him, Cesar Milla...”

“Of course, Ive told Jesus to suck it, too, which earned me a certain measure of notoriety, because you have to make fun of any religion that would let you have sixteen kids and say its Gods will.”

“So yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can't help it.”

“Another example of getting flack from the boys is what happened when Jack Black dumped me. Thats right. I fucked Jack Black. Okay, we went out only two or three times, but thats a relationship in m...”

“When my pals in high school were starting to drink, it always looked unappealing to me. I would be at a big party and see one of the popular girls or football players completely wasted and puking a...”

“Most people new to a city on the ocean would probably go to the beach during the day when there are people around. I, on the other hand, decided to try a midnight swim at the somewhat gamy Santa Mo...”

“The great thing about celebrity culture is that they can't seem to stop themselves from displaying their ridiculous behaviour. I feel it's my job as a serious investigative journalist to witness al...”

“A lot of stars don't have a sense of humor.”

“I was raised right — I talk about people behind their backs. It's called manners.”

“Of course, I’ve told Jesus to suck it, too, which earned me a certain measure of notoriety, because you have to make fun of any religion that would let you have sixteen kids and say it’s God’s will.”

“It always pisses me off when I’m calling in to some Morning Zoo radio show to promote God-only-knows what—probably this book, so get ready, I’m comin’—when the DJ actually tries to convince me that...”

“Can you believe this shit? Hell has frozen over. Now, a lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. He didn'...”

“4th booster f**kers. Oh, and CVS gave us EIGHT free Covid tests for getting boosted!”

“You know what's great about my mom? She compulsively swears and doesn't know it. Like...I mean, she doesn't have Tourettes. I could never get that lucky. Can you imagine how it would be to have par...”

“Have you guys noticed that Madonna is British now? OK, let's talk about her lineage for a minute. Raised in Michigan, moved to New York, is British. She started turning British like at the Golden G...”

“There's something about Shania Twain I just don't trust. I don't know, I can't put my finger...she's just too thin. I like my country singers to have the big hair and the big ass.”

“She (Mariah Carey) could not fuck more black rappers. Oh, yeah. If your name is Puff or Daddy, she'll fuck you.”

“She (Monica Lewinsky) is the kinda girl who'll blow a guy and call you and tell you all about it.”