21 quotes found
“My limits know me well enough to stay out of my way.”
“Hating Britain is a fundamental part of being British”
“How fickle is my young male heart as it avidly jumps from love to love”
“You could say Im so manly I dont even allow manly stereotypes to influence my actions”
“No religion can fully accept another religion, thats the one belief all religions share”
“You could say I’m so manly I don’t even allow manly stereotypes to influence my actions”
“My greatest strength is an unfocused mind. This is because while you are all thinking of one idea, Im thinking of five different ideas. My greatest weakness however is an unfocused mind. This is be...”
“I wouldnt have minded school if they taught you important things like how to have good sex and what brand of wine is the best But for some reason they were hell bent on teaching me algebra”
“I hope I can never trust my wife. If I trust her it means I know her. If I know her it means I understand her. If I understand her it means I can control her, and if I can control her it would make...”
“The other day, a friend of a friend said that everyone started out as girls, but boys evolved But dont worry girls, I hit him.”
“Now that Ive reached the ripe old age of retirement, I feel it my duty to teach you everything Ive learnt about love, so listen closely. Love is like Thats as far as Ive gotten Im afraid.”
“Losing your virginity is a lot like when you find out that Santa doesnt exist First youre slightly disappointed, and then youre happy because youre in on the secret”
“By passing your GCSEs you prove that youre not an idiot But by passing your A levels you prove that youre smart”
“I imagine God creating humans was much like cavemen creating fire First it sparkles brightly, full of life and beauty. But then it grows, stronger and fiercer until it becomes dangerous and uncontr...”
“Love is the one thing in this world that you should never have to go through alone For unreciprocated love is the most soul crushing experience you will ever go through.”
“I wouldn’t have minded school if they taught you important things like how to have good sex and what brand of wine is the best… But for some reason they were hell bent on teaching me algebra”
“No religion can fully accept another religion, that’s the one belief all religions share”
“Losing your virginity is a lot like when you find out that Santa doesn’t exist… First you’re slightly disappointed, and then you’re happy because you’re in on the secret”
“Now that I’ve reached the ripe old age of retirement, I feel it my duty to teach you everything I’ve learnt about love, so listen closely. Love is like… That’s as far as I’ve gotten I’m afraid.”
“By passing your GCSEs you prove that you’re not an idiot… But by passing your A levels you prove that you’re smart”