10 quotes found
“Reality continues to ruin my life.”
“I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.”
“When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.”
“Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice.”
“I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.”
“Calvin:"It says here that 'religion is the opiate of the masses.'...what do you suppose that means?"Television: "...it means that Karl Marx hadn't seen anything yet”
“I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long.”
“You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!!”
“Calvin : There's no problem so awful, that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse.”
“I'm a misunderstood genius.""What's misunderstood?""Nobody thinks I'm a genius.”
