21 quotes found
“Edwyn can almost feel his testicles crawling up his ass.”
“There are four kinds of people to avoid in the world: the assholes, the asswipes, the ass-kissers, and those that just will shit all over you.”
“My heart can see the ass in you.”
“Women are like shower faucets, you must treat them carefully, because if you do not, it will either burn your balls or freeze your ass.”
“Everything is about disclosure.... chemistry... love.... reaction... you can't do anything.......A pain... a biatch... pain the ass... two women... what next?”
“The ass is the face of the soul of sex.”
“Are you going to spank me, daddy? I'm a very bad girl! (bending over naked)"Oh yeah daddy - spank my ass harder!!!”
“I'm not a religious man, but I do worship your ass.”
“I tagged your ass the other night," I said, "while you were sleeping- and you liked it.""Really? I thought it was a dream." "It was. A WET one.”
“Sadness is like growing of hairs around our ass; we may not like it or want it, but it is surprisingly always there.”
“I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55.”
“When the world kicks your ass, don't step in line.book: stuff i think about”
“You can't say asses in church unless you are speaking of donkeys.”
“Employment is an employees kissing of an employers ass. A salary is the employers pretense to be cleaning his ass.”
“The reason why a man cannot stop staring at a woman ass is only because God has spent 80 percent of his time and efforts on woman ass and 20 percent on her entire body.”
“I decided to masturbate with shampoo instead of conditioner today. Because yolo. Things Jesus never said.”
“I'm the perfect girl. You read about me in Maxim or whatever. I tell dirty jokes like I'm one of the guys, and I'm sitting there in my panties and bra so you can see I'm a piece of ass in the barga...”
“Gotta love a woman that can hand you your own ass.”
“Three year in prison and a dick is just another thing to put up your ass.”