“The right thing and the easy thing are never the same.”

“Its funny how you can live somewhere your whole life, but not really see it.”

“We are given to the great, for great purpose, to great ends. We are given to the grave, for grave purposes, to grave ends.”

“You're so full of crap, you could pass for a toilet.”

“Are you insinuatin' that my daughter is a liar?""Oh, no, not at all. I'm saying your daughter is a liar. Surely you can appreciate the difference.”

“Well? Is it true? Did she?""Did she what?""You know. Fall outta the crazy tree and hit every branch on the way down?”

“If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.”

“Sometimes you know you've got a chance with a girl because she wants to fight with you. If the world wasn't so messed up, it wouldn't be like that. If the world was normal, a girl being nice to you...”

“Smirking, he says, "Whatever spell you just tried to cast on me, it didn't work, so I think you need to go back to Hogwarts.”