“If you trust in yourself. . .and believe in your dreams. . .and follow your star. . . you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy.”

“Witches are naturally nosy, said Miss Tick, standing up. Well, I must go. I hope we shall meet again. I will give you some free advice, though.Will it cost me anything?What? I just said it was free...”

“And that's when I first learned about evil. It is built in to the very nature of the universe. Every world spins in pain. If there is any kind of supreme being, I told myself, it is up to all of us...”

“It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it's called Life.”

“If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.”

“Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.”

“I think it is just a matter of getting into the mind of the writer, Vetinari went on, looking at a letter covered with grubby fingerprints and what looked like the remains of someones breakfast. He...”

“You're stubborn- anyone ever tell you that before?”

“Wouldn't want to miss a war, would I?”

“In some ways blowjobs are better than sex because when you have a mouthful of cock you can't make snide comments.”

“Or was he merely a mollycoddled favorite, enjoying capriciously prejudiced love? Schenback was inclined to believe the latter. Inborn in nearly every artists nature is a voluptuous, treacherous ten...”

“Progress in social psychology is necessary to counteract the dangers which arise from the progress in physics and medicine.”

“From school desks with inkwells and scratchy nibs on paper to sweaty finger prints on a tablet... technology progression yes... style?”