“She talks like you. Its not every day you hear a four-year-old say Prince Charming is a douchebag whos only holding Cinderella back. "Thats my girl.”

“You know on TV when theres one of those awkward, shocking moments and all you hear are the crickets in the background?Well chirp fucking chirp...this is one of those moments.”

“Im well aware that thisthat Iam the first man to ever do this to her. And yes, as a guy, thatfact makes it even better.You know who Neil Armstrong is, dont you?Now tell me who the second guy was. H...”

“Dont put off till tomorrow anyone you could be doing today.”

“You cant get a reaction from someone who doesnt give a shit.”

“Vaginas beat penises every time. They're like kryptonite.Penises are defenseless against them.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”

“Every great love starts with a great story...”

“I knew, in the silence that followed, that anything could happen here. It might be too late: again, I might have missed my chance. But I would at least know I tried, that I took my heart and extend...”

“You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question.”

“There is more to sex appeal than just measurements. I don't need a bedroom to prove my womanliness. I can convey just as much sex appeal, picking apples off a tree or standing in the rain.”