“Are you an evolutionist? I’m an absurdist, ma’am. But let’s suppose evolution is true; what about the monkeys today? Why can’t we see them evolving? Are they still evolving?”

“Just because you're beautiful and perfect, it's made you conceited.”

“My love is pizza shaped. Wont you have a slice? Its circular, so theres enough to go around.”

“My love is meatloaf flavored. I just wish my meatloaf was also meatloaf flavored.”

“We live in the Age of the Higher Brain, the cerebral cortex that has grown enormously over the last few millennia, overshadowing the ancient, instinctive lower brain. The cortex is often called the...”

“Two chemicals called actin and myosin evolved eons ago to allow the muscles in insect wings to contract and relax. Thus, insects learned to fly. When one of those paired molecules are absent, wings...”

“Soon we shall discover that the temple of all humanity is nothing less that the Temple of the Living God!" ~ Chapter One, "The Awakening" ~ Discovering the Bliss of your True Divine Reality”

“If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.”

“Sometimes you know you've got a chance with a girl because she wants to fight with you. If the world wasn't so messed up, it wouldn't be like that. If the world was normal, a girl being nice to you...”

“Smirking, he says, "Whatever spell you just tried to cast on me, it didn't work, so I think you need to go back to Hogwarts.”