“You should not confuse your career with your life.”

“If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.”

“I like the relaxed way in which the Japanese approach religion. I think of myself as basically a moral person, but I'm definitely not religious, and I'm very tired of the preachiness and obsession ...”

“It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes several million sperm cells... to locate a female egg, despite the fact that the...”

“When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy. ”

“The problem with winter sports is that -- follow me closely here -- they generally take place in winter.”

“The Decision...I wiped my hands on my pinaforenow sullied and stainednot crisp or pressedas it had been before...”

“So why is a third of our world battling obesity and spending huge sums to burn off excess calories, while the other two-thirds yearn to get more of them?”

“I looked at him nonplussed. I realized that I have spent so many years being on a diet that the idea that you might actually need calories to survive has been completely wiped out of my consciousne...”

“This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.”

“I love you like a fat kid loves cake!”

“Hard work should be rewarded by good food.”

“You're the ruler of the universe. Try to show a little taste!”

“It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent.”

“Everyone carries his own inch-rule of taste and amuses himself by applying it triumphantly wherever he travels.”