12 quotes found
“- Why is depression the blues and not the grays? - Because racer!-Jarod Kintz and Stefan D”
“I'm always under surveillance from both the NSA, the Russian KGB, and the Bulgarian Army, so I'm the most invisible.”
“- Why'd you even think I'd read your diploma before, during, or after buying 10 copies of it in an all-you-can-drink online bar? - If I could drink what I read, I'd probably still be drunk on Joyce...”
“- Daddy wont buy me a new pony, so Im gonna burn my old one so he will have to buy me a new one. - Will a horse do? I'm a horse. I'm a horse. Yes, of course. Yes, of course. (That's a little childr...”
“- My love is about 2/3rds as invisible as her love, and that sort of transparency isnt really all that healthy in a relationship. - I chop trees down with my sharpened mustache, remember? Cloning w...”
“#NAME?”
“- Sort out the sort ofs from the maybes, and maybe you will start walking in the right direction, like youre on a treadmill. - You have your direction. I have my direction. As for the correct direc...”
“If you were to ask Jarod Kintz what his personal favourite joke was, he'd say the one with the island. The big one next to New Zealand.-Stefan D and Jarod Kintz”
“- Daddy won’t buy me a new pony, so I’m gonna burn my old one so he will have to buy me a new one. - Will a horse do? I'm a horse. I'm a horse. Yes, of course. Yes, of course. (That's a little chil...”
“I want you to judge me without thinking about it.I want you to give me advice without considering my opinion.I want you to expecting anything without the need to trust me.I want you to decide for m...”
“- If no one understands anything in the same way, what use is communication? - The best way to recycle empty soup cans is to tie a string to them and talk to yourself - from up to a mile away.”
“If you were to ask Jarod Kintz what his personal favourite joke was, he'd say the one with the island. The big one next to New Zealand.-Stefan D and Jarod Kintz”