“I know what you're thinking. How the hell does this broke ass piece of trailer trash know words like caveat, right? Well guess what? I've read every single book on the New York Times list of 'Top 1...”

“Around eighth grade Margot started getting really sensitive about her weight, even though she wasnt remotely fatjust a little round-faced. So Margot did what any normal fourteen-year-old girl would...”

“God damn, I wish I could fast-forward time and be old and wrinkly. How awesome would that be? No more worrying about getting ogled by douche bags like Trent Gibson, or getting all hormonal and both...”

“See, the thing is, I had a little misunderstanding with Trent Gibson in Pre-Calculus earlier. I dropped my textbook on his faceaccidentally, while we were discussing someequationsand he thought I w...”

“When Grant Blue reaches me, he bends his head down close enough that I can smell the soap and promise on his skin. Clean living and popularityIts quite the aftershave, let me tell you. If Im being ...”

“The fear of an unknown never resolves, because the unknown expands infinitely outward, leaving you to cling pitifully to any small shelter of the known: a cracker has twelve calories; the skin, whe...”

“I didn't realize there was a ranking." I said. "Sadie frowned. "What do you mean?" "A ranking," I said. "You know, what's crazier than what." "Oh, sure there is," Sadie said. She sat back in her ch...”

“I am forever engaged in a silent battle in my head over whether or not to lift the fork to my mouth, and when I talk myself into doing so, I taste only shame. I have an eating disorder.”

“Well my music was different in high school; I was singing about loveyou know, things I don't care about anymore.”

“There are a million rules for being a girl. There are a million things you have to do to get through each day. High school has things that can trip you up, ruin you, people say one thing and mean a...”

“For the record, I would like to point out that it is NOT being obsessive to memorize a boy's schedule so that you can accidentally bump into him. It is called being efficient.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”