“Its only when youre at the bottom of the ladder that you ascend.”

“Comics know that time plus pain equals humor and that we can redeem even awful moments from the past by translating them into a shared experience.”

“If anger were mileage, I'd be a very frequent flyer, right up there in First Class.”

“How about "diamonds are a girl's best friends"? Nope. It should be switched around and pointed out, instead, that your best friends are diamonds.”

“In short, immaturity is spoiled. And what is spoiled doesnt ripen. It goes bad early, gets bitter and withers on the vine.”

“To slur feminism into humanism is to usurp womens voices once again, to make the singular feminine into the so-called universal masculine.”

“I don't know why it's so hard for people to admit that sometimes they're just assholes who screw up because they don't expect to get caught.”

“You see, the best thing about wrong decisions is that they dont prevent you from making the right decisions later on. Its harder, but its not impossible.”

“Nigeria has divided itself into PDP and APC.The PDP is to go on making mistakes while APC is to prevent mistakes from being corrected.”

“All words are pegs to hang ideas on.”

“A word is not the same with one writer as it is with another. One tears it from his guts. The other pulls it out of his overcoat pocket.”

“No doubt I shall go on writing, stumbling across tundras of unmeaning, planting words like bloody flags in my wake....”

“Voice is not just the sound that comes from your throat, but the feelings that come from your words.”

“Words themselves aren't that important. Even if somebody says words that shock you, or make you want to kill them, or make you tremble with emotion, the words themselves you tend to forget in time....”

“If I disagree with you sometimes, it's because I have a mind of my own.”