“Adam and Eve had many advantages but the principal one was that they escaped teething.”

“This poor little one-horse town.”

“Fleas can be taught nearly anything that a Congressman can.”

“Get your facts first and then you can distort 'em as much as you please.”

“The jury system puts a ban upon intelligence and honesty and a premium upon ignorance stupidity and perjury.”

“There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race and finish the farce.”

“So said Hair-Face, and they killed him, because, they said, he was a wild man and wanted to go back and live in a tree. It was very strange. Whenever a man arose and wanted to go forward all those ...”

“We fool ourselves so much we could do it for a living.”

“He who hesitates is a damned fool.”