“I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”

“If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.”

“I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”

“Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.”

“Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. ”

“Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.”

“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so?There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”

“Be wary of strong drink, it can make you shoot at the tax collector...and miss.”

“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.”

“I have little use for religion as it is practiced, or for astrology, or for belief in witchcraft or omens of good or ill-luck. I think they all stem from some insufficiency in mens minds, perhaps f...”

“It is only the innocent mind which knows what love is, and the innocent mind can live in the world which is not innocent.”

“So if you can look at all things without allowing pleasure to creep in - at a face, a bird, the colour of a sari, the beauty of a sheet of water shimmering in the sun, or anything that gives deligh...”