“Just because your life isn't as awful as someone else's that doesn't mean it doesn't suck. You can't compare how you feel to the way other people feel. It just doesn't work.What might look like the...”

“I knew people were talking, but I wasn't listening. I wasn't interested in anything anyone had to say.”

“I think he just loved being with the bears because they didn't make him feel bad. I get it too. When he was with the bears, they didn't care that he was kind of weird, or that he'd gotten into trou...”

“When I was a kid, I used to watch that show, sitting on the couch in my pajamas and wishing more than anything that one day I'd just change into this other person. I thought that would explain ever...”

“So that's it. That's the big secret. I tried to kill myself on New Year's eve. Just like Sadie did last night. Only she really did it. I don't know all the detatils, just the basics. She took a bun...”

“He said that I have to remember that even though I've changed a lot in here, I'm going back to a world that hasn't changed”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”

“You're stubborn- anyone ever tell you that before?”

“Wouldn't want to miss a war, would I?”

“In some ways blowjobs are better than sex because when you have a mouthful of cock you can't make snide comments.”