“He was really having a hard time with this. He was not a seductive kind of guy, and if he tried to be sexy, he was going to sound like Romeo, the porn version.”

“After six long hours of driving and three rest stops, Tiger pulls up to a snow-topped, metal speaker box just outside the State Penitentiary's first gate in Walla Walla. As he rolls down his window...”

“A girls got to use what shes given and Im not going to make a guy drool the way a Britney video does. So I take it to extremes. I dont say I dress sexily on stage - what I do is so extreme. Its mea...”

“It was a full Spears album, apparently, and each song was as ridiculous as the one before. They were catchy, yes, but so was the plague.”

“New Rule: The White House doesn't have to release the dead Bin Laden photos, but don't pretend we can't take it. We've seen pictures of Britney Spears's vagina getting out of a car. Television has ...”

“Life itself is simple...it's just not easy.”

“Making peace is often a simple thing, but simple isnt the same thing as easy.”

“Everybody was sorry. Sorry was easy. Sorry was for suckers.”