“True love is usually the most inconvenient kind.”

“Try patting them on the back or shoulder and telling them everything is going to be fine. Lots of times when girls cry, they don't want you to fix the problem, they just want to be consoled.”

“I hope you find someone you can't live without.I really do. And I hope you never have to know what it's like to have to try and live without them.”

“No, Im not choosing him or you. Im choosing me.”

“If you dont want me to be in love with you, youre going to have to stop looking so lovely. First thing tomorrow Im having your maids sew some potato sacks together for you.”

“You get confused by crying women, I get confused by walks with princes.”

“There were a group of people before the Ascension known as the Astalsi. They claimed that each person was born with a certain finite amount of ill luck. And so, when an unfortunate event happened, ...”

“Well, good luck, the Vietnam verbal tic...It was as though people couldnt stop themselves from saying it, even when they actually meant to express the opposite wish, like, Die, motherfucker. Usuall...”

“Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances. (Either that, or my luck's terrible.)”

“If we could survive without a wife, citizens of Rome, all of us would do without that nuisance; but since nature has so decreed that we cannot manage comfortably with them, nor live in any way with...”

“When we are at peace within our marriage, the effects can be astounding! We will raise happier children, become better employees, and overall find the joy in life.”

“Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.”

“Leaders are visionaries with a poorly developed sense of fear and no concept of the odds against them.”