“It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I'd never even thought about killing myself.”

“Right now Im having amnesia and dj vu at the same time. I think Ive forgotten this before.”

“I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room.”

“If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.”

“Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.”

“When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”