“I love you like a fat kid loves cake!”

“The key to career advancement is appearing valuable despite all hard evidence to the contrary. If you add any actual value to your company today, your career is probably not moving in the right di...”

“Its tempting to imagine happiness as a state of mind caused by whatever is happening in your life. By that way of thinking, were largely victims of the cold, cold world that sometimes rewards our g...”

“You probably think the majority of your crabbiness is caused by the idiots and sociopaths in your life plus your inexplicable bad luck on any given day. Based on a lifetime of observation, my best ...”

“Of the big five factors in happinessflexible schedule, imagination, diet, exercise, and sleepmy pick for the most important is exercise.”

“Youve seen for yourself that when a sad person enters a room, the mood in the room drops. And when you talk to a cheerful person who is full of energy, you automatically feel a boost. Im suggesting...”

“If you hire people just because they can do a job, theyll work for your money. But if you hire people who believe what you believe, theyll work for you with blood and sweat and tears.”

“My model for business is The Beatles. They were four guys who kept each other kind of negative tendencies in check. They balanced each other and the total was greater than the sum of the parts. Tha...”

“Dont worry, Im not quitting. Ive decided Im going to stay andmake his life a living hell while I run his business into the ground.--Kim to Abe”

“If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.”

“Sometimes you know you've got a chance with a girl because she wants to fight with you. If the world wasn't so messed up, it wouldn't be like that. If the world was normal, a girl being nice to you...”

“Smirking, he says, "Whatever spell you just tried to cast on me, it didn't work, so I think you need to go back to Hogwarts.”