“There is more to life than making a living. Do not work more than you live.”

“The employed are punished by having to do what they do not love. The self-employed are punished by the opposite.”

“Most people do not mind having a house that is smaller and/or a car that is cheaper than their neighbours, as long as they each earn and have more money than their neighbours, and, equally importan...”

“We have glorified wealth and freedom so much that it is impossible for most of us to truly believe that a man can truly be happy in a shack or within the confines of a prison cell.”

“Culture is a symbolic veil with which we hide our animal nature from ourselves and other animals.”

“Plagiarism is the fear of a blank page.”

“I love new clothes. If everyone could just wear new clothes everyday, I reckon depression wouldnt exist anymore.”

“Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself-like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.”

“Guilty feelings about clothes are totally unnecessary. A lot of people earn their living by making clothes, so you should never feel bad.”

“I cleaned the shit off my pink high-tops and drove home, stopping for an espresso at the coffeehouse across from the college. Men and women were hunched over copies of Jean Paul Sartre and writing ...”

“Best of all, she waits outside the dressing room while I'm changing. Girlfriends don't do this but wives do, and if there is any better reason to get married than to have someone to hold your hand ...”

“[T]he dozen or so items I wished to return to XXI Forever could only be traded in, and the store had a strict BOGO policy: Buy One, Get One (Free). This means that the 12 items I had but did not ne...”