“Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.”

“All women should know how to take care of children. Most of them will have a husband some day.”

“You never realize what a good memory you have until you try to forget something.”

“Experience enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.”

“Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent job.”

“Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid.”

“Money can only used to buy man-made goods.”

“And don't tell me debt is not a big deal. Debt will cut off your legs and laugh at you as you grovel in the dirt begging for mercy. If you don't need it, don't get it. If you can't afford it, don't...”

“One thing you'll learn when you're in the business of selling utter shite to the Great British Public is that there's really no bottom to where they'll go. Shit food, shit TV, shit bands, shit film...”