“America is a land where a citizen will cross the ocean to fight for democracy - and wont cross the street to vote in a national election.”

“Youth is when youre allowed to stay up late on New Years Eve. Middle age is when youre forced to.”

“You darling is my semicolon.”

“Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”