“Men are mystifying creatures. For instance why do all men think their penis is a panacea for all the worlds problems?”

“I suppose youre young, she conceded, managing once again to make youth sound like impetigo”

“The Classic Notting Hill junkie, i.e; Armani underwear, Pinks shirt and Burberry belt tourniquets”

“I had walked all over the fragile bloom of his heart like a Boadicea in Blahniks”

“Clamboring over building detritus was not the lifestyle Karl Lagerfeld had in mind for this sweet little powder-blue suit. As he oversaw the hand stitching in his atelier he had probably imagined t...”

“The Duke is worried you lack the fitness to walk up Bond Street. Youre generation lacks the drive.”

“I swiftly discovered that there are few things in DIY (and possibly life) that can't be solved with a large mallet, a bag of ten-centimetre nails and some swearing.”

“My friend Annabel calls it "Reverse Perfectionism" - if a man thinks he can't do something perfectly, he'd rather not do it at all”

“Having someone do certain things for you is like getting someone to chew your food for you.It might be easier to swallow but it loses all its flavor...And you want the flavor!”