“Life never was long enough to provide time for enemies. Nor is it long enough for people who bore me, or for me to stand around boring and antagonizing others, or for all of us, the others and me, ...”

“I'm on my high school football team and MUST show how much I know.”

“When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place.”

“True New Yorkers do not really seek information about the outside world. They feel that if anything is not in New York it is not likely to be interesting.”

“When you leave New York you ain't going anywhere.”

“The office of the president is such a bastardized thing half royalty and half democracy that nobody knows whether to genuflect or spit.”

“There are many things that make a man irritable when he arrives home from work in the evening and a sensible wife will usually notice the storm-signals and will leave him alone until he simmers down.”

“Oblivion, she thought. That was the world she lived in. It was what they should name some countries, towns, and places.”

“A lot of men wouldn't like being called a romantic. It's not macho enough.'Quite often men are fools.”

“We fatties have a bond, dude. It's like a secret society. We got all kinds of shit you don't know about. Handshakes, special fat people dances-we got these secret fugging lairs in the center of the...”

“Because theres a silent, shrugging, stoical acceptance of all the things in the world we can never be part of: shorts, swimming pools, strappy dresses, country walks, roller-skating, ra-ra skirts, ...”

“My fat years were when I was not human shaped. I was a 16-stone triangle, with inverted triangle legs, and no real neck. And thats because I wasnt doing human things. I didnt walk or run or dance o...”

“I am a war president.”

“CBS's Major Garrett writes in 'National Journal' about a new version of the 'stray voltage' theory of communication in which the president purposefully overstates his case knowing that it will crea...”

“I have been president of the Indian Kabbadi Association, and likewise, I have been associated with various other sports as well.”