“My stepfather, John O'Hara, was the goodest man there was. He was not a man of many words, but of carefully chosen ones. He was the one parent who didn't try to fix me. One night I sat on his lap i...”

“Mother Teresa didn't walk around complaining about her thighs -- she had shit to do.”

“Nothing seems crazy when you're used to it.”

“I am diagnosed with not having enough insanely-addictive drugs coursing through my body.”

“Great News! If you quit being cunty the whole world will stop being against you!”

“To all you sensitive sallys out there who spend your time scribing angry letters, I have great news: Scientific models show that in the not-too-distant future, all the races will become so complete...”

“Not everyone may not think the way you do.”

“I think you're wrong.""Think what you like.”

“To think, to think, even with a split second left - to think was the only hope.”

“We sit for a few more moments, although there's really nothing left to say. This is new to me, too, an entire conversation that takes place in silence, because the heart has its own language. I wil...”

“I'm always amazed at anyone's interest in what I have to say.”

“The least one can say of power is that a vocation for it is suspicious.”

“Well, I'm not a big sports fan.”

“I'm a Luddite with computers, and I'm slightly worried about being hacked as well.”

“Canadians are very well behaved, they don't throw their food.”