“My first public impression was my French teacher, Derek Swift.”

“Scotland needs comedy more than ever. With the independence debate, finally after 300 years, reaching room temperature.”

“For such a small country, Britain packs in an amazing diversity of landscapes: coastline, lakes, mountains, rolling countryside, villages and great cities.”

“When I think back to my childhood, it's with a mixture of amusement and embarrassment. I was always forgetting things. My mum called me scatty because I could never sit still. But there was no sens...”

“I love anywhere new and different. That's the fun of travel. I've always loved driving through Spain, France and Italy - sometimes in an Alfa Spider.”

“So to recap: we may or may not be going to war with Iraq because Saddam may or may not have weapons of mass destruction, which he may or may not use, or pass to other terrorists groups with whom he...”

“What people these days watch!?...Nothing useful!Science proofs that people watch shit over and over and over and over and over and over.”

“In 1966, NASA took over in space, and it has been a bureaucratic mess ever since.”

“Pets, like their owners, tend to expand a little over the Christmas period.”

“You like me not because I like you. I like you just because I like me.”

“Maybe the truth is I really want to like you instead.”

“If somebody likes me, I want them to like the real me, not what they think I am.”

“Being the people we are, and feeling the way that we do, getting excited about going somewhere new can be terrifying. Of course it is, I get it! But if you dont travel, youll regret it. Your soul w...”

“Happiness is something you lay siege to, it is a battle like a game of go. I will take hold of all the pain and snuff it out.”

“For God's sake, if I learned anything during this damn trial it's that the only way someone can leave you is if you let them. And I'm not doing that, Dee. It may look like that today, or tomorrow, ...”