“Ok.. So are you goin’a let him bluetube your tweeter?”

“We all look for happiness, but without knowing where to find it: like drunkards who look for their house, knowing dimly that they have one”

“There are hours for rest, and hours for wakefulness; nights for sobriety and nights for drunkenness(if only so that possession of the former allows us to discern the latter when we have it; for sad...”

“Well enough, I reply. Remember, youre drunk. And happy. Youre supposed to be lusting over your escort. Try smiling a little more. like Im lusting? This is me, lusting. His lashes flutter at me. bet...”

“Cut the ending. Revise the script. The man of her dreams is a girl.”

“Girls get screwed.Not that kind of screwed, what I mean is, they're always on the short end of things.The way things work, how guys feel great, but make girls feelcheap for doingexactly what they b...”

“Try patting them on the back or shoulder and telling them everything is going to be fine. Lots of times when girls cry, they don't want you to fix the problem, they just want to be consoled.”