“Pain is a byproduct of life. Thats the truth. Life sometimes sucks. Thats true for everyone. But if you dont face the pain and the suck, you dont ever get the other things either. Laughter. Joy. Lo...”

“Theres nothing that makes you more insane than family. Or more happy. Or more exasperated. Or more . . . secure.”

“Every soul is special. Theyre all beautiful. Theyre all far more significant than anyone on this rock realizes. I think when people are at their best, theyre acting in accordance with their soul. T...”

“Evil isnt the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as Evil, maybe more so, and its a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against Stupid. That might actual...”

“We have now left Reason and Sanity Junction. Next stop, Looneyville.”

“I was seducing shepherdesses when you weren't a twinkle in your great-grandcestor's eyes. I think I know what I'm doing.”

“Epic sex?" I sputtered. "By what standards, precisely, is sex judged to be epic?""And tons and tons of mortal simps like you used as pawns." Bob sighed happily, ignoring my question. "There are no ...”

“Jobs are a part of life. Maybe you've heard of the concept. It's called work? See, what happens is that you suffer through doing annoying and humiliating things until you get paid not enough money....”

“Love is another kind of power, which shouldn't surprise you. Magic comes from emotions, among other things. And when two people are together, in that intimacy, when they really, selflessly love eac...”

“You can have everything in the world, but if you don't have love, none of it means crap," he said promptly. "Love is patient. Love is kind. Love always forgives, trusts, supports, and endures. Love...”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”