“I'm scared David""That's good, because there's lots to be afraid of”

“Scientists talk about dark matter, the invisible, mysterious substance that occupies the space between stars. Dark matter makes up 99.99 percent of the universe, and they don't know what it is. Wel...”

“When a man plans, a woman laughs.”

“Fred said, Man, I think hes gonna make a fuckin suit of human skin, using the best parts from each of us.Holy crap, said John. Hell be gorgeous.”

“John, let me make one thing clear, Jim said, cutting me off in his most stern, evangelical voice. Every man is blessed with his gifts from the Lord. One of mine happens to be a penis large enough t...”

“...and - holy shit was this song bad. It was like the singer was stabbing my ear with a dagger made of dried turds.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”