“Thought about being a stand up comedienne for zombies, but when they eat you alive, they really eat you!!”

“Years ago there was an old man I knew that told me he didn't trust me, because people with beards were hiding from something. I told him, "That's true, I'm hiding from the barber!!”

“Remember never to text and drive, it's bad grammar, even if you have a deadline. You might cross the line and dead may be your destination. Think about it!!”

“Just out of sight around a bend in the river there's always a small island full of magic and mystery just waiting for you.”

“Well they have to have something to wean Caluntians off Venusian moles. Seems humans are the best therapy, to consume that is. They say we are a bit gamey though. An acquired taste, one we hope not...”

“Dale, a Plutonian Dreg Bug, the kind with seventeen eyes and a bad temper, got nailed in one of his eyes by a wild dart. Fight broke out when he punched Earl in the nose. Earls nose is very sensiti...”

“Those who work, knows the strength of labour.”

“I only have so much willpower, Helen," he whispered. "And since you apparently sleep in the most ridiculously transparent tank top I've ever seen, I'm going to have to ask you to get under the cove...”

“I'm infatuated with you, I cannot deny it. Physically speaking, you're a very attractive man. But I don't like you, the vast majority of the time. So far as I can gather, you behave abominably in p...”