“You have no idea about presents or what they mean. The lastpresent you gave me was a stick.You wanted a weapon.It was a stick.It had a bow on it.It was a stick.I thought you liked the stick. You la...”

“You look angry," he said."You put me on hold.""For a very good reason.""You put me," she said very, very slowly, "on hold.”

“Of course I want to kill you," said Skulduggery. "I want to kill most people. But then where would I be? In a field of dead people with no one to talk to.”

“If anyone stops us, as long as we mumble something pretentious about the glory of death, we should be fine.”

“Every once in a while, I get the urge. You know what Im talking about, dont you? The urge for destruction. The urge to hurt, maim, kill. Its quite a thing, to experience that urge, to let it wash o...”

“I cannot have chaos erupting around me until I am prepared for it. I am a collector. I am an observer. I don't participate. My resources, and my standing, must be secure before I can allow the unce...”

“work at our responsibility as parents as if everything in life counted on it, because in fact everything in life does count on it.”

“Happiness [is] only real when shared”

“That's what people do who love you. They put their arms around you and love you when you're not so lovable.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”