For the first time in history, middle-class women do not need men in the traditional ways - for safety, for money, for a life. So theyre demanding instead what they always wanted but couldnt ask for: emotional connection, presence, intimacy. Sex with enough foreplay, enough seduction, enough closeness to please them. Men are baffled not only because the needs they are being asked to fill differ so from what their fathers and grandfathers understood to be their jobs but also because full-fledged intimacy requires strengths and skills theyve never learned. Moreover theyre strengths and skills that were once left solely to women: Men didnt have to develop them. This maturational mismatch may be contributing to distrust among lovers of all ages.

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Themes

  • Marriage — Partnership, commitment, and the journey of shared life

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