“Marriage is like a series of opposing reflections, inverse images getting ever smaller like nesting dolls, each one of your trying to squeeze yourself smaller to fit inside the hopes of the other, ...”

“I used to dream of true love; now I'm open to false, but convincing....”

“Maybe life involves the pairing of unsuitable people, those who wait and those who keep others waiting, and the key to happiness is finding the one person with whom you share the same internal chro...”

“The only thing more difficult than persuading someone else to start having sex with you is persuading yourself to stop.”

“Be optimistic. Always put on clean underwear if you're going on a date.”

“If you give a man a hammer, he thinks he can solve all problems by pounding. Well, God gave men penises....”

“I wondered what happened when you offered yourself to someone, and they opened you, only to discover you were not the gift they expected and they had to smile and nod and say thank you all the same.”

“Well?" Ron said finally, looking up at Harry. "How was it?"Harry considered it for a moment. "Wet," he said truthfully.Ron made a noise that might have indicated jubilation or disgust, it was hard ...”

“People always fall in love with the most perfect aspects of each others personalities. Who wouldnt? Anybody can love the most wonderful parts of another person. But thats not the clever trick. The ...”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”

“For the love of mercy, I cannot walk into mediation with a swollen vagina, Cash. Please.I smile against her thigh, rubbing my scratchy face against the softness of her skin.Is that what Im doing? I...”

“So that's the telephone? They ring, and you run.”

“How beautiful would history have been if it could be written beforehand and then acted out like drama!”