7 quotes found
“... keeping her wild-honey-and-chamomile-soaked hair from falling into her oatmeal-and-yogurt face mask”
“Screw sharks a Transformer could be stretching up on its tippy toes and would still have a mile of cover to eat me. ”
“As a rule, I try to steer clear of opinions pertaining to your parenting. I assume you're doing the best you can, and God bless.”
“You should totally get implants," she said admiringly in the mirror. I shake my head. "I don't yet know what I'm going to do with my life, Diane. But I'm hoping being shaped like a barbell could on...”
“The more Mommy blogs going nuclear over playground etiquette I read and birthday parties of glazed adults munching cupcakes like demoralized zombies I attend, I realize this is what my friends who ...”
“My writing partner, Nicki, and I became obsessed with a monologist who performs unscripted shows equipped with nothing more than scribbled bullet points and a glass of water. We wrote him a fan let...”
“We 'chicks' have munched our popcorn while romantic comedies became just comedies, and then each female protagonist got recast for Matthew McConaughey or Seth Rogan.”