“If they ever turn, let them chase me for a while. Its always been afantasy of mine to be chased by zombie cheerleaders.”

“Sup? he asks. My voice rattles when I answer. N-not much. You know, reanimated corpses chasing me on a cruise ship. Same old.”

“Thank you, Deke. You are very good to me. I know, he smirks. Can I get back in your bed now?”

“If I can face a street full of rabid zombies, I can tell a boy I like him. Right?”

“If they ever turn, let them chase me for a while. It’s always been afantasy of mine to be chased by zombie cheerleaders.”

“S’up?” he asks. My voice rattles when I answer. “N-not much. You know, reanimated corpses chasing me on a cruise ship. Same old.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”

“A court that wouldn't just change the world. It would start the world over.”

“Red in the head, Silver in the heart”

“I have a theory that the answers to all of life's major questions can found in a John Mayer song.”

“The procedure, not yet approved in the United States or in Europe, was a form of stem cell therapy.”