“Jose: Do not drop me senorJeff:i wont drop you,joseJose:then i be jose jalapeno on the floorPeanut:do a little tap dance and we got salsa!Jeff:Thats terrible!Peanut:not with the right chips its not...”

“Jeff- "A Hanukkah tradition is making potato pancakes. For something a little different, use a sweet potato. Anything you'd like to add, Walter?"Walter- "Accept Jesus as your Savior or you'll burn ...”

“When I was eight years old, I got a dummy for Christmas and started teaching myself. I got books and records and sat in front of the bathroom mirror, practising. I did my first show in the third gr...”

“Family time was very difficult when my girls were little, but I never missed a birthday; I was there for every major event.”

“The magic in performing as an entertaining ventriloquist happens when the characters come to life and the interaction between the separate personalities on stage becomes 'real.' Then don't forget t...”

“I've always said that instead of watching a guy juggle seven things amazingly I would rather see a really bad juggler who's really funny.”

“A little tranquil lake is more significant to my life than any big city in the world”

“Something amazing happens when you're in love and don't give a damn about what day it is anymore.”

“I cant tell you anything about yourself you dont already knowWAITunless you dont know youre an incredibly freaking amazing person with boundless gifts to sharethen I can tell you that.”

“We are human only in contact, and conviviality, with what is not human.”

“The problem is this: nature has assembled all these species on this planet. The human species is no more important than any other species on this planet. For some reason, man accorded himself a sup...”

“More than the disappearing trees and roses, its the human tendency to suppress the Natural Voice of the Natures Man which is sorrowful.”

“We sit for a few more moments, although there's really nothing left to say. This is new to me, too, an entire conversation that takes place in silence, because the heart has its own language. I wil...”

“I'm always amazed at anyone's interest in what I have to say.”

“The least one can say of power is that a vocation for it is suspicious.”