“I'm afraid one thing - I don't like heights. Heights bug me out. I'm not cool with heights. I refuse to do a comedy show 12 stories up. I'm fearless about everything else.”

“I'm on my version of the protein diet, but there ain't no protein in it. It's a Krispy Kreme doughnut between two Cinnabons. And you soak it overnight in Red Bull. Then you chase it with a Snickers.”

“My life is gardening, cleaning around the house and power washing.”

“I loved Peter Sellers. I thought he was the perfect mix of physical comedy with out-of-the-box humor. I loved his tone I loved his physicality I loved everything about what he was doing as a comedi...”

“I don't like work--no man does--but I like what is in the work--the chance to find yourself. Your own reality--for yourself not for others--what no other man can ever know. They can only see the me...”

“Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.”

“Earning happiness means doing good and working, not speculating and being lazy. Laziness may look inviting, but only work gives you true satisfaction.”

“The universe is seeming really huge right now. I need something to hold on to.”

“The Universe is under no obligation to make sense to you.”

“Sometimes I try to erase myself. And then, if I've done a good job, I'm erased. I'm nothing. And then the world is free to flow into me like water into an empty bowl. And I see. I hear. But not wit...”

“We can learn to work and speak when we are afraid in the same way we have learned to work and speak when we are tired.”

“If we feel inwardly strong, we will have no need or desire to speak ill of others.”

“My problem is I say what I'm thinking before I think what I'm saying.”