“Every July, I look forward to taping a Christmas show - in July in Nashville. In 98-degree weather. I love it.”

“We try to make the name longer and longer every year. First, it was 'Larry the Cable Guy's Christmas Spectacular.' Then it was 'It's a Very Larry Christmas.' Now it's 'Larry the Cable Guy's Hula-pa...”

“I love food: biscuits and gravy, cheese grits, spaghetti and meatballs, chicken-fried steak with white gravy... but my favorite dish is my wife's beanie weenie cornbread casserole. It's so good. It...”

“I think probably one of the coolest things was when I went to play basketball at Rucker Park in Harlem. First of all, who would think that Larry the Cable Guy would go to Harlem to play basketball?...”

“What a piece of garbage this smart car is. There's a commercial - the smart car has zero percent interest for six years. Well, good, I got zero percent in six years in buying this smart car. I'll t...”

“[In reference to Playstation Football] Here's an idea! Why don't they make a button that says frickin' pass!”

“When everyone failed to hear my screams, you are the only one who heard my silence.”

“Network marketing is not for everyone because, NOT EVERYONE has goals. Stop trying to make everyone around you goal-oriented.”

“Someday I must read this scholar Everyone. He seems to have written so much--all of it wrong.”

“The price of stability is unpreparedness.”

“The cost of a thing is the amount of what I will call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.”

“The price of love is high- but pain- we sell it cheap.”

“July 4th fireworks exhale over the Hudson sadly.It is beautiful that they have to disappear.It's like the time you said I love you madly.That was an hour ago. It's been a fervent year.”

“And she learned that you couldnt stockpile anything that mattered, really. Feelings, people, songs, sex, fireworks: they existed only in time, and when it was over, so were they.”

“When you meet someoneso different from yourself,in a good way,you dont even have to kissto have fireworks go off.”