“[Bobby Tom] finally understood Gracie's function in his life. She was God's joke on him.”

“What New York City football team did Joe Namath play for?""The New York City Yankees!"A roar of laughter went up from the crowd, accompanied by more than a few loud groans. Bobby Tom silenced them ...”

“I happen to be immature, undisciplined, and self-centered, pretty much a little boy in a man's body, although I'd appreciate it if you didn't quote me on that.-Bobby Tom”

“You couldn't be satisfied with being an amateur asshole, could you, Jimbo! You had to go and turn pro on me!”

“Throughout the course of the day, Bobby Tom's irritation over his artificially oiled and dirt-smeared chest and his unzipped jeans had flared into righteous indignation. They were treating him like...”

“Anything worth having is worth fighting for.”

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”

“I've always said that idleness dulls the spirit. We have to keep the brain busy, or at least the hands if we don't have a brain.”

“If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.”

“Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect fo...”

“Of all the bright cruel lies they tell you, the cruelest is the one called love.”

“Don't cry, I'm sorry to have deceived you so much, but that's how life is.”