24 quotes found
“Dogs are angels full of poop.”
“A cow's heaven is a flower's idea of hell.”
“A fish tank is just interactive television for cats.”
“It's better to dance like a fool, than to stand around like an idiot.”
“Heaven is a place where all the dogs you've ever loved come to greet you.”
“Although I'm an atheist, I try not to crap all over people's belief in God. It may be nothing more than a placebo, a fairy tale that gives the hopeless hope, but sometimes a little hope is all peop...”
“I believe, if there is some sort of higher power, the universe is it. Whenever religious people ask me where the universe came from, I tell them that it has always been here, and was never created....”
“Happy Endings are an illusion. Real life is filled with brief moments of fleeting happiness, but ultimately every life is a tragedy that ends in death and grief.”
“Ordinary people are products of their environment and fit in. Artists transcend their environment and stand out.”
“Democracy's fatal flaw: There are more dumb people than smart people. Welcome to the new Dark Ages!”
“A beautiful woman can have almost any man she wants. A rich man can have almost any woman he wants.”
“Our words are often only vague, inadequate descriptions of our thoughts. Something gets lost in translation every time we try to express our thoughts in words. And when the other person hears our w...”
“Dogs will give you unconditional love until the day they die. Cats will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since the day you were born.”
“Some guys like to undermine a girl's self-esteem with little verbal jabs. Eventually it all adds up. One bee sting doesn't hurt a horse, but enough bee stings can kill a horse.”
“How love works: Proximity leads to intimacy, and intimacy leads to a relationship. In other words, people who are around each other a lot, get close, and end up hooking up. So it's no great mystery...”
“Good things you have to make happen. Bad things happen all by themselves.”
“Books like Twilight are not art. They are mass-produced crap that is meant to be consumed by the widest possible audience, for the largest possible profit.”
“Imagine a wall that's green on one side and red on the other. You stand on one side and only see green. I stand on the other side and only see red. We'll both be right about the color we see, even ...”
“The happiest people are not the ones with the best or the most things, but those who most appreciate what they have.”
“Free will? Either you follow the word of God, or you'll be punished with eternal hellfire. That's the same kind of "choice" an abuse boyfriend gives you: 'Either you do exactly what I say, or I'll ...”
“Just because everyone CAN publish a book these days, doesn't mean everyone SHOULD. The world doesn't need 1000 knock-offs of 50 Shades of Grey. I'm not so sure the world even needed ONE 50 Shades o...”
